latineando

Friday, April 22, 2005

The first day.

It gets to feel weird when you're the only female around with a lap top using the even weirder WiFi facilities.
I do fell akward still on a personal level, I don't know how to start. I thought It would be easier, seguro.
The first heavy rainfall of the year is approaching, here in Chile we're entering winter. Here when it gets cloudy, the weather seems to be gentler, but as soon as the sky gets cleared, the so called southern wind (as it were coming from the south pole) freezes every one. I live in the fairy town of Renhaca, where no poverty is to be seen around. Contrasting with the views that are waiting for me this afternoon, when I take food to the dogs up in the mountain> When going by car you sometimes come across the human tolls, called "peaje" here. Where poor and not very honest youngsters, and not so young ones, do not let you continue, they do stop the car. Until you toss them coins, to be ussually spent on drugs, likely pasta or alcohol. But here on the leather couch, that reality feels sooo far away.
It was hard coming back to this city, I must admit that my present situation has made social intercourse easier. When I first got here 6 years ago people weren't that friendly, specially women, well now I'm not only older but heavier, still cute though, and survived a violent marriage. I do admit I hate it when people fell sorry for me. I like to believe that I'm a surviver. They should have felt sorry for me when I was living with the son of a bith who beat me and I was so depressed, shocked, embarrassed, to do anything. Still difficult in a machista country, divorce only exists since last year. And the best schools around are ruled by nuns and priests.
MY daughter brought me back to reality, she helped me get on my feet, and when she turned 1, I was strong enough to walk on my own. Now she's turning 4 next month. I was lucky, she s always been with family around, and now I think I can manage with a part time job for a while.
I still can t tink of a relationship yet. I'm doomed to have sex on my own, with my faithful middlefinger sometimes helped with a vibrating machine, of course; specially after a hard working day, no hand can move as fast as required :)
I guess that's too much information, and boy I didn't even start talcking about politics ....
Chile might have a breakthrough, It might have a female president, which is good; both female candidates are right , the only problem is that they both belong to the one that has been the ruling party for the past 15 years or so, ever since Pinochet.

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